NotAllowedTo | Satire News And Entertainment

Man Convinced Of Being A Vampire Accused Of Stealing Blood

LA | Deputies of the Rapid Parish Sheriff’s Office (RPSO) have arrested a man this morning for stealing and drinking... Read more

Woman Goes Blind From Chlamydia After Cheating On Husband With Pet Koala

An Australian woman has lost 80% of her eyesight after contracting chlamydia from her pet koala, reports the Murray River Chronicle.... Read more

MAN BURNS DOWN EX-WIFE’S HOUSE WITH REPLICA OF THE ARK OF THE COVENANT

A Georgia man is facing charges of attempted murder and arson after he allegedly built a replica of the ark... Read more

Woman Files Police Report After Realizing She Slept With White Men, Not Black

FL | A young woman who had been partying at a Miami club last week has filed a police report... Read more

KENYA: Chinese Tourist Arrested With Zebra Penises In His Luggage

Officers of the Kenyan Customs Services Department have arrested a Chinese tourist attempting to board a flight for Shanghai after finding... Read more

Mortician On Bath Salts Accused Of Eating A Dead Man’s Corpse

OH | An employee of the Franklin County Morgue was arrested last night after it was found that he had desecrated the... Read more

Man Horny For “Prison Sex” Purposely Violated Probation To Get Thrown Back In Jail

CA | A San Francisco man intentionally broke his probation by sticking his penis in a police car gas tank... Read more

Former Church Of Scientology Member Was Forced To Have Sex With Aliens”

Munich | A former member of the Church of Scientology has revealed this week on German television how he was... Read more

Canadian Trapper Survives Brutal Sexual Assault By 200-Pound Beaver

A Canadian trapper claims he has survived a brutal sexual assault by what he calls the “biggest beaver he has... Read more